Gabriel Garcia Marquez has a remarkably uninteresting article on his fellow-Columbian, pop singer Shakira, in The Guardian. Here's an example:

Guardian Unlimited | Special reports | The poet and the princess Today, her dreams have more than come true. Shakira's music doesn't sound like anybody else's, and she has invented her own brand of innocent sensuality. "If I didn't sing, I'd die," is a thing often said lightly, but in Shakira's case it's true: when she's not singing, she's hardly alive. Her inner peace comes from an ability to feel alone in the middle of a crowd. She never has stage fright: she's only frightened of not being on stage: "I feel," she says, "like a lion in the jungle." It's where she can be who she really is.

Gag me with a magical realist spoon.