Least loved Halloween Treats:

1) Toothbrush -- give me a break. Traditionally distributed by dentists. Explains dentistry's awful public image.

2) Pencils.

3) McDonald's gift certificates. Gee, thanks. Now I get to bug my parents until they break down and take me for fast food.

4) Candy Corn -- what the hell are they, anyway.

5) Oversized Red Hots. It burns, Mommy, it burns.